It's not my fault!

[trinityvixen]

By now, you know the drill: correctly guess the quote's movie/speaker, and you get, uh, well, you make the quote go un-bold-y. Yay!

1. "The Almighty tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fucked."
Stephen - Braveheart

2. "Ten minutes at Elton John's and you're as gay as a maypole."
Joe (the manager) - Love, Actually

3. "Still using all the muscles except the one that matters?"
Agent Smith - The Matrix Reloaded

4. "I'm not a doctor. I never went to medical school. I'm not a lawyer, or a Harvard graduate, or a Lutheran."
Frank Abagnale Jr - Catch Me If You Can

5. "Yeah, OK, I have an idea. We draw straws and the loser runs across the lot with a ham sandwich."
Steve - Dawn of the Dead (2004)

6. "Come quietly or there will be trouble."
Robocop - Robocop

7. "Spiders! The spiders, they want me to tap dance...I don't want to tap dance."
Ron Weasley - Harry Potter and the Prizoner of Azkaban

8. "Well, boys, our monochromatic friend's in danger. Looks like we have a job to do."
Skipper - Madagascar

9. "First rule of leadership: everything is your fault."
Hopper - A Bug's Life

10. "I don't know about homicide, but you've sure got me for raising my voice in a public library."
Cotton Weary - Scream 2

11. "I'll flip you for it. Heads: I tell you. Tails: we go out on a date."

12. "It will be nice working with proper villains again."
Basher Tarr - Ocean's Eleven

13. "How many sins could you have committed in three days? Come back when you have more time, please."
Alejandro Murrieta (Zorro) - The Mask of Zorro

14. "I realise you witnessed the missus and I working through a few domestic issues. That's regrettable, but don't take that to be a sign of weakness--that would be a mistake on your part."
John Smith - Mr. and Mrs. Smith

15. "Don't sell yourself short, Judge. You're a tremendous slouch."
Ty Webb - Caddyshack

16. "But if the Pirates of the Caribbean breaks down, the pirates don't eat the tourists."
Ian Malcolm - Jurassic Park

17. "The worm has turned and it is now packing an Uzi."
Will Randall - Wolf

18. "I'm on Planet X looking for a dweeb who wears green fatigues. He wears glasses."
Jack O'Neil - Stargate

19. "I have a real life, and I'd appreciate it if you only call me down here when there's a REAL emergency. If one of my patients comes in carrying his own head, call me."

aaaaaaaaand a Christmas one (though you wouldn't know it from the quote itself):

20. "There are two things in life I hate: heights and jumping from them."