One more thing
Feb. 23rd, 2009 12:31 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
trinityvixenNo, really, that show was made of fail. I've seen better YouTube videos than those montages, and they sure would've cost a hell of a lot less to throw up there. Likewise, if you're going to remix dissonant songs, find someone who isn't deaf to do your arrangement. And way to shove all the "ethnic" people you possibly could into that part so the white people could walk off with the rest of the awards.
The following people are banned from ever making an appearance on the Oscars again, in order of how much I loathe them: Seth Rogen, Jack Black, Bill Maher, and Ben Stiller. Why can't we just rip Jack Black's tongue out? Does he really contribute all that much? (The fake trailer of his farting family movie in Tropic Thunder is about as close to a real statement about his popularity as I've seen.) If Bill Maher is so fucking self-satisfied, he should get a gig teaching guys how to give themselves blow jobs. Seth Rogen: WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU SO FUCKING FAMOUS? (James Franco, please continue to do non-Seth Rogen movies in the future.) Daniel Craig and Twilight-boy are allowed to come back when they stop taking this shit so fucking seriously and learn how to goddamned read. Does no one get any hint of what the fuck they're going to say before they get on stage? Do they really have to be teleprompter dependent? Let them memorize before they get on, then have the script there if they need it. That way, maybe the glittery vamp-twit could get the part about where he was supposed to be telling a joke (thus ruining that totally rad setup joke of Ben Stiller forgetting to tell his joke) and Daniel Craig's dyslexia wouldn't be so embarrassingly obvious.
The following people should just be on all the time: Hugh Jackman, Will Smith, and Tina Fey. Let them host from here on out. Will Smith can handle the singing, Tina Fey can give out the popular awards, and Hugh Jackman can give out the little awards. That way, even if they cut you off after you say "Thanks!" and never show a stitch of the movie you died to make, at least Hugh Jackman will have touched you. You can die happy.
Every other award should go Mickey Rourke from now on. (Dear god, somebody please love him? He needs help.) If Mickey Rourke can't hold any more statuettes, let Meryl Streep carry the rest as she steps over the bodies of her enemies and pierces their eyeholes with her heels. If she so deems it proper, she can give the rest to Robert Downey Jr. and Johnny Depp. They can chuck the awards at the heads of the Academy for a) authorizing this fuckshit nightmare, and b) never giving either of them the respect they deserve. The entire team at Pixar will be welcome to help.
Oscars, how are you made of such resplendent fail?
The following people are banned from ever making an appearance on the Oscars again, in order of how much I loathe them: Seth Rogen, Jack Black, Bill Maher, and Ben Stiller. Why can't we just rip Jack Black's tongue out? Does he really contribute all that much? (The fake trailer of his farting family movie in Tropic Thunder is about as close to a real statement about his popularity as I've seen.) If Bill Maher is so fucking self-satisfied, he should get a gig teaching guys how to give themselves blow jobs. Seth Rogen: WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU SO FUCKING FAMOUS? (James Franco, please continue to do non-Seth Rogen movies in the future.) Daniel Craig and Twilight-boy are allowed to come back when they stop taking this shit so fucking seriously and learn how to goddamned read. Does no one get any hint of what the fuck they're going to say before they get on stage? Do they really have to be teleprompter dependent? Let them memorize before they get on, then have the script there if they need it. That way, maybe the glittery vamp-twit could get the part about where he was supposed to be telling a joke (thus ruining that totally rad setup joke of Ben Stiller forgetting to tell his joke) and Daniel Craig's dyslexia wouldn't be so embarrassingly obvious.
The following people should just be on all the time: Hugh Jackman, Will Smith, and Tina Fey. Let them host from here on out. Will Smith can handle the singing, Tina Fey can give out the popular awards, and Hugh Jackman can give out the little awards. That way, even if they cut you off after you say "Thanks!" and never show a stitch of the movie you died to make, at least Hugh Jackman will have touched you. You can die happy.
Every other award should go Mickey Rourke from now on. (Dear god, somebody please love him? He needs help.) If Mickey Rourke can't hold any more statuettes, let Meryl Streep carry the rest as she steps over the bodies of her enemies and pierces their eyeholes with her heels. If she so deems it proper, she can give the rest to Robert Downey Jr. and Johnny Depp. They can chuck the awards at the heads of the Academy for a) authorizing this fuckshit nightmare, and b) never giving either of them the respect they deserve. The entire team at Pixar will be welcome to help.
Oscars, how are you made of such resplendent fail?
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2009-02-23 05:19 pm (UTC)Every time they did the cutaway to show multiple pictures framed in blue, the moving images in the blue (especially the Kung-Fu Panda one) were terribly distracting and annoying.
I missed everything Bill Maher said because my son had been terribly sick all day and finally woke up and wanted to eat at that point. I think I am glad I missed that.
I thought that was Ben Stiller. (missed the intro there) That was really tasteless.
Other than the segment last night, I've only seen Seth Rogen in Freaks and Geeks and he was fine as an emotionless stoner, but was not funny last night. Agreed.
I did think it was kind of cool to have the little circular stage area and the main acting nominees right around that. Those stairs seemed to be much more maneuverable than the standard design.
no subject
Date: 2009-02-23 05:24 pm (UTC)You're definitely better off for missing Bill Maher. Too bad you had to see Ben Stiller. That whole bit made me pause because this was the problem that Chris Rock started--openly mocking individual celebrities that he didn't deem worthy of respecting. Joaquin Phoenix went crazy, fine. What if he comes back? I'd love to see him punch Stiller in the face.
Seth Rogen. Ugh. He is an emotionless stoner. In his Daily Show interview, he spent the entire time advocating pot smoking and basically being in love with himself. He's not acting; he just plays Seth Rogen.
I confess I liked the stage set-up. Other than that, feh.