The Rabbit Hole

I'm lumping together the two "actually good" categories of movies I saw in the theater because, really, after posting about the so-bad-they're-brilliant movies, I've just lost a lot of the oomph to keep going. So here we are, two weeks into 2012, finishing off my remembrances of 2011.

2011's Actually Good Movies

( Lots of discursion, needs a cut. )

So those were the movies I deemed good, subjectively or objectively, and you're free to disagree with me as you please. I don't have real dogs in any of those fights, though I suspect I won't have to defend myself overmuch. This next list, though, are movies that I foresee going into heavy rotation in future--go-to new classics and favorites. Be gentle with me on these?

2011's New Favorites:

( Love it or leave it! )

I wanted to get to the So-Bad-It's-Brilliant category right away, but I have to stop first and pay respects to the other milestone on the way to the better movies.

( Better than they had any right to be. (No, really!) )

New Year's Resolutions are kind of the bane of my existence. Looking back at what I've previously resolved, I see so much that I've not done. I resolved three years ago to finish the cross-stitch for my sister's wedding. (It is now going on seven years late!) I have resolved, every year since I went, to make a scrapbook of my time in Australia. I feel moderately better that I've gotten some more supplies for it--and I sent the majority of my photos to be digitized, so I have those things safe and digital and not just in hard copy. That's got to go on a list for this year, if only to not still be cluttering shit up when I (HOPEFULLY) have to move this year. I also have vague plans to volunteer more and maybe see a few more plays this year. But that's about it. Making resolutions seems to be as far as I go to accomplishing them.

One thing that I resolved and totally succeeded in? SEEING 52 MOVIES IN THE THEATERS LAST YEAR. I did it before December was over, and by 2011's end, I had seen 56 movies in the theaters. I saw fewer seasons of TV than ever before this year. I watched a paltry 176 movies for the first time, and I didn't even clear 20 books this year. (In my defense, five of the books I did read were George R.R. Martin's A Song of Ice and Fire books, which should could for at least three books each.) But I got this one thing done. All in all, it was a really fun resolution, and one that, despite occasionally driving me crazy and making me panic about falling behind on it, I generally enjoyed accomplishing. Going to the movies is, relatively speaking, a cheap outing and a great time. There were more than a couple of trips where I had so much fun with the company that the content was irrelevant.

I'm going to have to break this down by genres. Not genres of movies, but the genres of how I felt about those movies. This may take a few days. Let's start with the worst movies. That way, it's all uphill from here. Without further ado...

So Bad, It's Shameful to Admit I Saw Them
Season of the Witch - Nicholas Cage made a great bad movie this year, and it was Drive Angry. I can't believe I saw this instead. And that I dragged my family to it, no less.

I Am Number Four - Timothy Olyphant aside, there's nothing to this Twilight-with-aliens-knock-off to make it worth anyone's time. It makes sense that it's so trite and cliched given that it was based off an assembly-line writing process.

Sucker Punch - The ultimate proof that style does not trump, much less make up for, substance. Such a waste. And sexist to boot.

Hobo With A Shotgun - Ugh. I may have been mad at other movies I saw that both sucked and blew, but this was the only one that made me feel literally unclean for having been a part of. I was ashamed, really and truly, for being in the audience, and the whole time I wanted to just leave. I desperately wanted to leave. I sat through the entirety of Ang Lee's Hulk without leaving, but I wanted out of this movie within the first five minutes. I feel gross just thinking about this movie. It disgusted me and it made me hate everyone around me who found it at all amusing.

The Hangover Part II - Beyond it's blatant homophobic "laughs," this move blew just because it was an exact retread of the first movie. When I say exact, I mean, cut-and-paste-the-"plot"-points duplication. Fuck this movie.

Cars II - Bizarrely, Larry the Cable Guy was the best part of the original Cars. His character was genuinely sweet, whatever his voice actor's typically obnoxious schtick. Making a sequel entirely about how much of a loser he is and then having him come from behind to save the day or whatever was a mistake. Making a sequel at all may have been a mistake. This is Pixar's only real failure of a movie, but, er, wow, when they miss, they miss by a lot.

Green Lantern - Dear. God. I haven't seen a comic book movie that was this much of a mess since the aforementioned stab at telling Bruce Banner's story. It literally made no sense. I wasn't even drunk enough to hand-wave away how bad it was. And it was bad at everything. I give it zero marks in every category. No one acted at all, if they could help it. No one had any chemistry with anyone else--the leads all reacted to one another with as much warmth (love or hate) as they would a subway pole. Things happened that had no connection to anything else, and the progression from loser to hero followed a trajectory that can best be described with the following dingbats: ...?...!?...!?!?!!?!?!?!

Transformers: Dark of the Moon - I have to give props to Michael Bay for concocting a plot line whereby we went to the Moon to discover Transformers. That was pretty fucking batshit out there crazy. Otherwise, this movie is even less relevant than anything that's come before it. All the problems of the franchise already abundant in the earlier movies were there and then some since several Oscar-worthy actors decided to debase themselves by signing onto this shit show and needed their own scenes to be humiliated. At least the racist twins were gone?


Stay tuned for the next installment, wherein I discuss the movies that were colossal disappointments! And maybe some that were even just mediocre! You can't wait! I know it!

I'm at work, but my brain is on vacation and has been for hours. So to kill time, after I realized that my movie resolution is in peril of failing after August because I haven't added any movies to it, I went to the IMDB to see updated release dates for movies (and to check if some movies I've been looking for have gotten release dates yet).

At the bottom of whatever IMDB page you're on, which I kept reaching because I had to scroll through entire months, there's a set of pictures of things you've recently looked at. At work, that includes the pages for both Thor and Chris Hemsworth. I'll be like, "Huh, I wonder if War Horse will be any good....oooooooh, prettty!"

Brain. Firmly stuck on vacation mode. Fortunately, time has now caught up to it, and I'm out the door. Peace!

I saw three movies in the theater this weekend, and they run the gamut between good, bad, and oh-my-God-this-is-for-real-awesome. They would be Source Code, Sucker Punch, and Unknown, respectively. All you need to know about Unknown is that it's a thriller about conspiracies surrounding an assassination, and Liam Neeson is in it. It's truly fun in the way only a Liam-Neeson-fights-everyone movie can be. moonlightalice has called for an entire series of these movies. I hope she gets her wish.

Sucker Punch is not a good movie. I may have a longer post on why that is, but for now, let me just say that it is decidedly not great. Not the worst or even the most abusively bad movie ever, but certainly not the best movie either. It would be a terrific series of music videos--and, indeed, I liked a lot of the music playing over the scenes, although, as ever, Zach Snyder's omnipresent musical guru, Tyler Bates, displays excellent, if predictable, taste, and lousy, lousy execution. For instance, he seems incapable of realizing that music in the background shouldn't build to a crescendo only to be dropped to a whisper when someone has to utter some potentially plot-enabling dialogue (for as much as such things existed in Sucker Punch that is). The music would go LOUD-soft-speaking-LOUD unnecessarily. Save it for a break when you can truly amp up your gothic remix of "White Rabbit," okay?

Source Code is good, although it was also frustrating. I liked it, but it doesn't quite work--not as well as Moon worked. It wasn't brave as it should have been. I liked the central sci-fi premise, and the suspension of disbelief was not an issue. No, revisiting someone's memories of a time should not allow you to change things or to experience things that they could not have known, seen things they never saw, etc. But you roll with it because that's what they need you accept, that's the price of entry, and it's not that high a bar to clear. What I realized this morning is not that the sci-fi aspects are overly complicated, it's that the movie hasn't got the courage to stick to their rules. moonlightalice expressed a lot of this when we saw it, but it wasn't until this morning that it really bugged me. Not sticking to the rules, moreover, raises a lot of questions--and a lot more sci-fi complications--that the movie doesn't answer and shouldn't have had to anyway.

Performance-wise, I was completely in love with Vera Farminga's character. Without being able to move her body, her face had to convey her internal struggle as she guided Jake Gyllenhaal's character through his paces. She was amazing and so utterly human. I think, to its credit, that is why Source Code works, where it does. It sketches out people instead of archetypes with its characters, with the exception of the more villainous folk. They were very cardboard/cookie-cutter, but as they existed only to flesh out the conflict--internal and external--in the protagonist characters, that was not an issue for me. And, like with Moon, what you know about Source Code already, from trailers and reviews, doesn't give away the film. You can know the basic premise and not know where the movie is necessarily going. It's not like a "twist" ending or anything, just that the set up takes you in (mostly) well-thought-out directions that are still somewhat surprising and always interesting and frequently touching. It's the rare movie these days that can tell you exactly what to expect and still be a surprise. Whatever its faults, Source Code does that much, and that is not a little thing.

After this weekend, I'm now only three movies behind where I should be with my movie-a-week resolution. I won't fall further behind for this week at least, since I've got movie-going plans set, but I need to start picking up the slack before I lose too much more time. Tsk tsk. I never thought it would be this hard to get my ass out to the movies just slightly more than I do already, yet here I am. I would have been better able to manage it if the Oscar Showcase wasn't stupidly split up this year. Alas!

Despite the best efforts of the Big Momma's House sequel trailer to put me off the movies forever, I did get out to the theater this weekend with viridian , xannoside ,jlc , and ecmyers to see The Green Hornet. Honestly? Not as bad as I was expecting. It was stupid, but I laughed. I still loathe Seth Rogen and the idea of his being a movie star for doing absolutely nothing but playing himself (so, stupid and usually stoned). I still laughed. Perhaps because he looked like the idiot he so clearly is for pretty much all of the movie? Probably.

We did see one intriguing trailer for a movie called Hanna, which features a little girl who's able to kick more ass than all the 300 dudes combined. I've added it to my list of movies. I'm probably going upstate at the end of this week, since engagements prevented it over the long weekend. (They were lovely engagements, and I wouldn't have traded.) I think I've almost talked my mother into seeing Season of the Witch with me.

Other weekend highlights included my first weekend of volunteering. It's fabulous. ( Beware: I squeal about kittens behind this cut. )

For anyone who might be worried that I will suddenly have fifteen cats, rest assured this won't happen. I feel desperately bad for the two all-black kittens that I've seen in the shelter that are sweet as anything and tiny. They should be adopted out because they're well-behaved and beautiful. Gaia, a Bombay mix, has such sleek fur and a dignified face that's totally ruined by the fact she constantly has the tip of her tongue sticking out. Malinda is smaller even than viridian 's kitty Callisto, but she's a cuddler and so adorable. I am not in any danger of adopting myself because I have the best cat in the world that loves me best and I've never had a cat that loved me best and I would never jeopardize that. That, and my other cat is so traumatized by the other cats that have come through my home that I couldn't put him through more of that either. And then there's the fact that these cats weigh, literally, one-quarter what my cats do. They'd never be happy.

So, no, I'm not adopting any pets. I am trying to get my mom to take one, though :) Her favorite kitty, Magic, who passed away all too young not so long ago, looks just like Gaia, right down to the few tufts of white hairs at her throat. My mother is remaining steadfast in her refusal to adopt more kitties, though, and with good reason. My brother has to give up his cat because his fiance is allergic. We're trying to see if my brother-in-law will take him, but my brother-in-law is being stubborn about wanting to pick out his own cat. (That's fair but annoying.) We won't let him go to a shelter, so my mother might end up with him. And she seems to think that she's going to end up with my cats when I go to school. Which is heartening--she thinks I'm definitely getting in!--and disheartening--I don't want to live without them!--but is mostly reassuring. (They'll always have a home with Grandma.)

What I don't understand is how people who can't have pets volunteer at the shelter. Without the quirky and difficult situation of cats at home, I'd probably have gone and adopted Malinda and Gaia already. But I have cats that I love and a dynamic that, while not perfect, would only destablize further if I brought more pets home. (Mostly because my roommates would, rightly, kill me.) Half the volunteers I talked to are pet-less, many because roommates are allergic, and I have no idea how they keep from taking home every sob-story pet they see.

I'm feeling...stuck. I think two weeks of vacation wherein I do almost nothing at all and barely leave the place I am residing have finally gotten to me. I'm not the type to get stir-crazy, not really--I could spend a weekend locked away at home and doing nothing and be utterly content. But two weeks? Is pushing it. I couldn't go anywhere in Oregon. I was so trashed from jet-lag from that trip that I couldn't barely leave the apartment in New York. (Hurrah! I have NO FOOD!) And when I went to my parents' place this weekend, I tended to park in places.

As a result, I'm feeling a need to start attacking my living environment, seeing as the weather is not exactly conducive to me running around outside much. Which brings me around to resolutions for the new year. I was fishing for others' resolutions this weekend, but no one had any great ones I could steal. I took a look at the last ones I made (two years ago, woo-hoo), and I rather like that they were productive yet not impossible. In keeping with that, I've decided on the following resolutions:

1. Clear out the bins under my bed
This is a huge project that will involve my, five years later, finally putting together a scrap book of photos from my trip to Australia. Better late than never. While the distance from the events means I'm almost sure to have forgotten every detail, I will be able to part with the junk I've stored up there, which is all for the good, really. I will also work on getting all my photos scanned in so I have digital backups. To think: if I'd been born only a few years later, I'd have had digital copies to begin with, which is really the most sensible thing for me, given how lazy I am about photographing shit in my life.

Huge project--projects, really, as I suspect the Australia trip isn't the only event collecting dust down there--but doable. Certainly doable within a freaking year.

2. Finish my sister's wedding present.
Only four years late on that one! I'm really, really close. I just need to go some place away from cats for a couple of weekends (i.e. upstate), queue up a hundred movies, and sit and sit and stitch and stitch. This one I'd like to have ready before her birthday in August (if I really push myself, I might have it done by her wedding anniversary in March). After I finish it, I then need to sit down with her and discuss what the shit she'd like me to do with them. I have chosen the most useless hobby, I swear. Cross-stitching is useful for two things: framing and making pillows. I wouldn't presume she wants these things framed (because then she's more or less obligated to hang them whether they're to her taste or not), and they're far too intricate for pillows. I was thinking, though, that working them in as panels in a quilt or a quillow (that's a one-square quilt block that is attached as the outside of a blanket pocket--it folds into a pillow with the nice design on the outside, and is used as a blanket with the nice design safely tucked away in the pouch). Must work on getting that done, first, and planning what to do with it, second.

3. Read twice as many books as last year.
I think I read about 20. That's pathetic. I have about six or seven that I've accumulated in the insanity of holiday busyness, so I can get off to a good running start. I just have to not let my time get shanghied by video games, TV, exercise, or movies too much. I think I can do it. I'd also be happy to just read about half again as many. So 30-40 books. Let's go team.

4. Lose 20 pounds.
This was the goal I set for myself when I first programmed my profile into the Wii Fit. I set a timeline of 6 months which is fastly coming to a close with all of about two pounds to show for it. (Which means zip-o given that you can fluctuate that much in any given day.) Whenever I fail at that resolution, I'll reprogram my goal to be for the year. The 20 isn't a number, it's a BMI thing. And while I have trouble with BMI standards, it is a useful benchmark even if it's an arbitrary one. We'll see.

5. Be a better person.
Ah, the vague one. I've actually been pondering this some time now, and a new year seems a perfect time to put into action some notions I've been entertaining. For one thing, I'd really like to pay a genuine compliment to someone every day. It's something I've considered a while now, sparked by a few genuine compliments I've received here and there. It would be so nice to be able to, without seeming like a crazy person (must work on delivery, delivery is key), tell someone (whether I know them or not) that they are particularly sharp, seem blissfully happy, or look especially well put together. I have to be careful not to just fish one out (i.e. avoid studied and saved compliments a la Mr. Collins), but to really mean it. I think that would really improve my mood, too.

This also covers vague life goals upon which I have no direction--career aspirations (hah!), personal fiscal responsibility, intellectual stimulation and enrichment, improved sociability--without making it seem like I've failed to accomplish anything if I have no specific incident I can furnish as proof.

Wow, I just don't have anything to post. I don't think, except for the stupid post-doc thing, I posted anything yesterday.

Random things to talk about:

-Last night, I ripped CDs to mp3s and watched episodes of House I'd missed. Say what you will about the show being basically an excuse to have Hugh Laurie be awesome and naughty and just have everyone else go "What crazy thing will he do next?", at least he makes it interesting. In one ep, he took a wheelchair down stairs. He actually did that himself. That's cool. Also, while the characterization of everyone else changes, it's nice that House is consistent. It's why it's fun to watch him be mean--he's the only one smart and ornery enough to stick by his irrationalities.

-shell524 deserves a hearty thanks. I made her recipe of mac and cheese this weekend and it came out fairly well! It'll take a bit of practice to be able to do it blind without the recipe and get the consistency/timing all together, but for a first time, it was easy and delicious. I hate wasted food, which is a good part of why I don't cook more (because I mess up too easily and would burn, therefore waste, food). That's two out of seven meals to make for my new year's resolution goal. Only five more to go. I might count re-learning how to make my mom's meatloaf and beef stroganoff as two, too. That requires the new grandma to be on the east coast long enough to tell me how.

-Speaking of the resolutions, I worked some more on my cross stitch last night. It's all in fits and starts with this thing lately. Last weekend, while feiran and I had a day at home together, I stitched for about five hours straight, and that's how I got the last one done, mostly--by relying on long stretches to get significant portions done. This past week, I've either meant to work on it and not done so, or I've managed a couple of hours here and there and that's it. Shameful. However, I would guestimate that it's maybe 5/8 done at this point. What's left is going to be super annoying (lots of blended colors and back-stitching). Oh well, I have two disks of Spooks arriving today.

( Ooh, and while I'm on the subject of 'Spooks' )

( So, yeah, woke up with a serious hangover this morning despite having booted most of my stomach last night. )

This is a time of resolutions, and, though I can't remember the ones offered last night or any I might have made, I'm going to make mine now: I vow not to get this wasted again for at least six months. I will not get wasted at my sister's wedding even though I have an excuse to (it will be free for me). For one, that's just dumb to do around family--my cousins Eric and Tanya got blasted on alcohol they stole from their parents once (they thought if they had a little of everything, the adults wouldn't notice any was missing) and it's still a family story. This was before they were legal, too, and both of them are now in their early thirties. That is shelf life, right there. I've gotten tipsy around family, but I know better than to get wasted. Everyone who has has the story told at every get together.

So, I resolve not to get wasted for at least half of 2005. I always make a resolution kind of like this after a bad binge, but this is New Years, and I'm pretty good with my resolutions, normally. I don't make ridiculous ones--saying I won't get wasted at all in 2005, for example (already blown, seeing as I booted after the ball dropped). The last two times it got so bad I blacked out and was violently ill were in Australia and at karaoke. Those were about six months apart from each other--the boat cruise was in August, karaoke was in March the next year. There was a mini-episode in February when we went out for the 100 days left of classes/celebrating my sister's engagement, but I don't count it because, while I was hungover and missed class, I was also a lazy senior, and it was a pretty special occasion. I also didn't puke. I lost a little bit of time and woke up confused, sure, but nothing like the other two nights

My New Years' Resolution: I resolve not to get wasted on alcohol or any other drug (not that I ever have, but just to be sure) for six months. My aim will to be to avoid any episodes at all for 2005 (excluding last night/this morning), but I won't have failed my resolution if I do. Nothing like a hangover to scare you straight.